sums.

Sometimes I find myself with a lull. Both boys are napping, and I just don’t feel like jumping right into household chores. Usually it’s because I’m super tired. So instead of working, I decide to ponder. (When you’re super tired, work is ALWAYS a better option than pondering.)

I ponder my current life. I contemplate how the weeks, days, hours are being spent. I reflect on the grand goal of my life — to glorify God — and visualize the trajectory of my actual life and the bulls eye of said goal.

You know where this is going, right?

Yeah. I come to the conclusion that I’m clearly way off the mark. I’m never going to hit it. How can

1. getting dressed
2. getting two more people dressed
3. helping my son make his bed and brush his teeth
4. nursing the hysterical baby
5. making pb&j
6. cleaning up the spilled milk
7. removing the pb&j plastered to little arms and hands and mouths
8. changing a diaper
9. reading a book
10. not losing my temper when my nose get bashed while little people get comfy for storytime
11. starting the book again
12. settling disputes over who touched who
13. taking care of the kid who disobeyed by not laying his head down
14. praying for the 3 year old as loudly as i can because the 1 year old has totally lost it
15. wiping the huge tears off chubby cheeks
16. nursing the baby to sleep
17. deciding to tackle the day’s demands (i.e. washing dishes, vacuuming, making dinner, folding laundry…)

amount to glorifying God??

I certainly don’t feel like I have to be living in Africa in a hut in order to be living a radical Christian life, but don’t I have to be doing more than the above? I’m suddenly panicking. How am I ever going to see the glory of God in my life doing this? I want my kids to know and love Jesus. I want the fruit of the Spirit to ooze out of me. I want our lives to be spent in service to the Church and the world around us. I DON’T SEE THIS ADDING UP!!

(I warned you, there’s panic involved.)

My head is hurting, trying to figure it out, trying to decide what radical thing I need to start doing in order to get a radical outcome. There are tears.

And then there’s a whisper:

Faithfulness.

Oh. I’ve heard this before. In fact, I’ve been here before. (Would you believe that young motherhood is NOT the first time I’ve found myself in a hum-drum sort of season? It’s true!)

Be faithful. Do what you know to do… faithfully.

And I suddenly realize what this is: a challenge to faithful sowing. Faithfulness is obviously a highly-valued attribute, but I forget that being faithful doesn’t necessarily mean doing some Really Big Hard Thing. It usually means doing Some Little Thing Every Single Day No Matter What. That’s what faithfulness means.

It means that even when I look at what I’ve accomplished today and some niggling little voice says, “Feel like a hamster in a wheel yet?”, I don’t cave. I don’t quit sowing these plain-jane little seeds in search of a huge glamorous job — because that would be unfaithful.

And it’s sowing those plain brown seeds with eyes of faith, knowing that there’s some sort of miracle inside that befuddles the human mind. It’s knowing that the sum is greater than its parts. It’s being content to just trust and obey.

“Trust in the LORD and do good;
Dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the LORD;
And He will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD,
Trust also in Him, and He will do it.
He will bring forth your righteousness as the light
And your judgment as the noonday.”

“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked…” — psalm 37; galations 6

7 Comments sums.

  1. darlenesinclair

    “It usually means doing Some Little Thing Every Single Day No Matter What. That’s what faithfulness means.”

    We read the Bible or a novel or read a magazine article. Everything is big and glamorous. Oh, yea. They left out all the ordinary details. All the peeled potatoes, washed socks, morning headaches. All the wiped noses, made beds, falling-off buttons. No mention of the field passed by for the 3,984th time with the same barn and cows.

    Oh, yeah. Real life. That’s where we show our stuff, prove our metal, learn faithfulness, grow in discipline (Yikes!!)

    You go girl, ’cause you know what? You are doing the big stuff everyday!

    Reply
  2. Michele Laramay

    Yes, yes, yes. Thank you, Danica for reminding us that we don’t labor in vain. I am sure that you would say that all the “faithfulness” on the part of your mom surely paid off. This was a great reminder to me to keep “doing the next thing”…and with joy. Thanks for sharing your pondering. :-)

    Reply
  3. sarah o.

    Wow. I like your ponderings. And the list of your day sounds a lot like my day can sound. (Although we aren’t even dressed yet.)
    Thanks for the encouragement to keep being faithful in the little things. It’s just the reminder I need.

    Reply
  4. Kristin Middleton

    Hmmm…your day sounds very much like mine! Thank you for this reminder. It’s very timely here at the end of the week.

    Reply
  5. Dottie

    “I’m suddenly panicking. How am I ever going to see the glory of God in my life doing this? I want my kids to know and love Jesus. I want the fruit of the Spirit to ooze out of me. I want our lives to be spent in service to the Church and the world around us. I DON’T SEE THIS ADDING UP!!”

    You ARE and WILL see the glory of God…..your kids DO and WILL love Jesus (I feel confident and trust in that)…..and, I am sure that the fruit of the Spirit ‘oozes’ out of you!! :o) You’re doing an awesome job, Danica, and are such an inspiration to so many people, especially young moms!! Remember, even scrubbing the kitchen floor can be done giving glory to God!! Danica, when I read your posts, I always pray that my children will be like you when they finally marry and have children. I want them to have that same strong faith and desires that you have to serve and follow our Lord!! Too many young couples/families are struggling SO much because they don’t know that they can “make it” with HIS help, with HIS guidance, with HIS love for them!! Keep it up, young lady!! You’re doing a beautiful job for the Kingdom of God!!

    “while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” 2 Cor. 4:18

    Reply
  6. Randi

    Jesus says to hear his words and do them. So, read the word. Hear it, and do it. That’s what glorifies God. Your heart in the right place… :)

    Reply

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