Date Archives → November 2009

being family

It’s been more than four years since we said “I do”, started this crazy adventure of blending (and bending) and becoming a family. Four years later, it feels like we’re still just beginning to figure out who this family is — and it’s fun. It’s fun to learn each other, add a few kids, try something new, let something go. (The more I let go, the more we become something unique, fun, useful.)

It’s still funny to hear people say, “We’re going to the Dunphey’s;” I only see us as Ryan and Danica, with two kids, learning to be a family. What do we look like from the outside looking in? I have no idea. And I have no idea how long it will be before I answer the phone, “Hello, Dunphey’s,” the way my mom says “Sinclair’s,” and Judy says, “Tomford’s.” I have a feeling it will creep up on me while I’m learning the art of loving this husband, mothering these children, making this home.

All of that to say, Ryan decided several months ago that rather than buying a medium flat latte every single morning at Peet’s, he would buy an espresso machine. But of course, not a push-the-button espresso machine; we’re talking weigh the beans on a scale, change the grind for every new roast, precisely 30 pounds of pressure with a very nice tamp, set the timer, and pull that shot in exactly 27 seconds. (27? I think.) It’s his new hobby. He takes care of this stainless-steel machine like it’s his car, spit-shining and all. In the evening, when the boys are on their way to dreamland, he makes me a decaf latte. Can you say spoiled?

And all of that to say, we have a new Saturday morning tradition: homemade chocolate chip scones and lattes for breakfast. I light the candle, set the table, and we gather around a plate of warm yumminess while Ryan pulls shots, giving us nothing but the best. It’s slow. It’s crazy one minute and calm the next. Sometimes we’re showered and dressed for the day, sometimes it’s a pj party. Mostly, it’s just one little thing we do that helps us stop and say, hey! We’re a family!

(You’re welcome to drop by and join us, of course. Just let me know, and I’ll pop a few more scones into the oven!)

bits ::

:: Hallelujah, Halloween is over. Now we can take walks through our neighborhood without me being disgusted — and without Jameson being confused. (“Yuck, Mama, look at that big spiderweb! They gotta kill that spider!”) Onto bigger and better celebrations — like being thankful for amazingly abundant provision, protection, guidance, and blessing in our lives. Isn’t that MUCH nicer??

:: The whole clock-change-thing really bugs me. I’m looking out on fading sunshine, trying to re-program my head to think 4 o’clock, when clearly, those are 5 o’clock shadows out there. At least, that’s what they were yesterday. Wouldn’t it be better to just leave our clocks alone?

:: My house is a disaster. No, really, it is. This week had lots of people in it, and not so much home-doing-chores in it. And the hours I had free were spent sewing. Yup, guilty. The good news is that the mess will wait for me. That’s the great things about dirty houses. They never disappear on you. You can always count on them to be right where you left them (and then some.)

:: Of course, if my house is still dirty next Sunday, it might be because I got all crazy, threw the boys and a few suitcases into the van, and headed to the East Coast. I miss my family like crazy, it goes without saying that I want my mama, and there are babies I need to meet! They need to know that I love them! December is sounding way too far away.

:: The only thing is, if I go to New York, I won’t be here. And you know what? I’m already missing my friends here just thinking about leaving for Christmas. I like our church, like the little families we hang out with, love our small group. Can’t I be in both places at once?

:: Today I played on the worship team. Poor Ryan didn’t get to enjoy a single bit of it, since the minute William saw me on the platform he [loudly] began exclaiming “Mama! Mama! Mama!” and made a beeline for the stage. It made me smile. I like being mama.