Why do I lose joy?
Perhaps because I need to be freshly filled with the Spirit.
And perhaps because I need to be reminded: it is the Lord Christ whom I serve. Seasons come and go, but joy doesn’t have to when I realize that I am called, fundamentally, to serving Jesus. Yes, I love this wonderful family! Yes, I love being a mother. I do! — far more than I ever could have imagined. But the thing that has continually been a source of joy, through every season, high and low, has been this: Doing the will of my Father. Knowing that I’m doing what God has asked me to do, and delighting in serving Him.
My soul delights to do God’s will. It just does. And sometimes, the cherubic face of my sleeping 3 year old just won’t cut it: my soul needs to know that I’m doing the will of God. No matter how menial the task, how exhausting the day, how buried the seed, I can find joy in the secret communion of my soul with Him: This is for You, Jesus.
And He smiles.
That brings joy.