worth reading: on children

“I’m not talking here of splitting hairs over when and if it’s ever OK to prevent children; we’re way beyond that. I’m asking, ‘do we share the heart of God about children or don’t we’?”


11 Comments worth reading: on children

  1. brietta

    When I read the article this morning (I think somebody linked to it on fb), that line jumped out at me. I love the sentiment expressed. So good… so God.

  2. Rissa

    Great article – I love it when I discover something like this because it’s so ‘no-nonsense’ and it’s *so* refreshing. Love it and love the way it so clearly communicates the heart of God. I want just thinking today that it’s such a shame that this topic is not discussed more often. Thanks for sharing – I posted it to FB!

  3. Julie M (Rochester, NY)

    Hi Danica,

    You may or may not know, but I subscribe to your blog (along with your mom and sister Brietta’s). I love seeing little glimpses into your Kingdom heart and family.

    Today when I saw this quote pop up in my Reader I was intrigued. And consequentially reviewed the original article.

    Wow, what a challenge and encouragement. It cemented in me some additional vision for the future.

    Thanks for sharing. And for being an example.

  4. Randi

    I have to admit I didn’t make it through the whole article word for word…. But, I believe that the size of a persons family is up to them. I don’t think that you have to have a big family or even try for a big family to be following God’s will. I used to think the same way as this article but I have found for some it can easily turn into an issue of legalism where one feels they need to have children to be godly or a guilt trip where they feel that they need to have more children to be godly or else God is angry. There are so many issues that can stem from making beliefs such as this one seem so biblically important. Yes, God loves children. Yes, God loves families. Yes, God wants married couples to have children. But, does God require those couples to have large families to fulfill some biblical mandate, doctrine, or command? I don’t think so. Does God require you to have children even if you don’t want to against your will? I don’t see that anywhere. If I decide to stop having children after number 2 or 3 or 4 am I going against the bible and committing sin??? No, I don’t think I am. I’m not trying to start a debate, I’m really not. These are just some thoughts I have and my mind can not be changed. I have just seen things like the “Quiverful Movement” and others make issues that God really does leave up to us and our preference into issues that seem as important as biblical doctrine. Really these things can just be doctrines of men. You know what I mean? And there is so many more important things to be thinking about and promoting like solid doctrinal teaching and verse by verse preaching. Thanks!

  5. danica


    I think you should try reading the whole article! And not just because I think it’s that good, but because I think you jumped to a conclusion about the article’s main thrust. The bottom line isn’t how big our families should be, but rather, what our heart is about children and the WHY behind our family planning decisions. The heart of our culture is so far from the heart of God in this matter — evolution, atheism, and hedonism are in the water we drink. It’s worth taking honest looks at our heart motives.

    Also, you say there are “so many more important things”. Actually, Titus 2 tells me that as a woman, I should be teaching about loving children. This IS one of the most important things. Getting God’s heart for children, and understanding how to value life the way that He does (more important that drywall, as the article says!), is actually imperative if we want our solid doctrine to mean anything. Why? Because Paul says that by falling short in this area, we blaspheme the Word of God.

    And again, there is no legalism in here: just a challenge to really embrace God’s heart, and be continually transformed by the renewing of our minds.

  6. Randi

    I did read the whole article and maybe I just don’t understand it? It happens! I guess because the main thrust of the article is “God’s heart” on children which the article clearly states is that God loves children…in my mind it seems to conclude that if God loves children and we are to adopt the article’s or “God’s” mindset on such matters, then to prevent children which God loves for any reason is to reject God’s view toward children and be in sin or missing out on God. See where I’m coming from or perhaps where I’m getting tied up or confused? Any thoughts are appreciated!!

  7. Randi

    Hey Danica, I grabbed a piece of the article to illustrate what I am trying to say and there are other parts of the article that could illustrate the same thing:

    From the Article:
    ~Yet we find every reason under the sun to avoid growing disciples in our homes–and to help others avoid it as well. Shame tactics, scare tactics, insults, “advice” about being responsible ensure that the average Christian family will cut off the godly heritage before it’s “out of control”….hmmm…sounds like the work of an enemy to me.~

    The author wants to say that it’s the work of the enemy when people don’t want to welcome more children based on reasons or excuses. The article starts out by saying that many people out there look at large families funny and have a poor reaction to them. It goes on to say that it’s not an article about splitting hairs on whether to prevent children or not. The rest of the article basically is an argument that the bible does want people to welcome more and more children into the family. Then this segment I have copied here basically shows the author has just same outlook on families that choose not to have a big family declaring that families that don’t welcome more children are rejecting growing disciples. This is part of my problem with the article. Growing disciples is not about quantity but quality.

    I do understand that this is an article, i think, based on reactions to large families and how people should just rejoice when another child is born to a christian family. I totally get that and agree. But what I can’t help feeling is there is an underlying belief in this article that God essentially wants you to not prevent children ever and to have as many as you can. No where in the New Testament is it suggested that a family needs to be large and no where is be fruitful and multiply commanded.
    Any thoughts?

  8. Jen Trelease

    Danica! I was just reading through some of your posts that I’ve missed out on (through Google Reader – thanks for letting us know about it!) at about 3am when Silas was wide awake. This article is awesome!!! So great. Thanks so much for posting it. I thank God for you! =)
    We’re sending out a package to you today in the mail with some goodies from T*rk*y. Thank you so much for your generous support! You guys are good good friends.

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