I’ve had a ridiculously hard time putting life into words lately — as you may have guessed, given the scarcity of writing here. I figured today would be a great time to jump back in, since today is one of those days when Life hands you an obvious writing topic:
Today I turn 29.
No, really. 29 as in yesterday I was 28 — not to be confused with 29 for the 15th time because I never want to turn 30.
Last year, my birthday was celebrated with three most special fellas, an Applewood pizza, and chocolate cake from Trader Joe’s (Ryan insisted on providing the birthday dinner!) We sat in our ridiculously small dining room, and William snuggled on my lap as we ate, because he was still a pretty young little guy.
This year, I’m 2900 miles away from that dining room. As I sit here, looking at my parents’ kitchen window at the rosiness of a new sunrise, I realize it’s not just a new day, and a new year, but a new season. So much newness! Pretty exciting.
Today I’m far away from my very, very most special fella, and I miss him. It’s been a long three weeks of being apart, and I can’t wait for Thursday, when he’ll leave the beautiful West Coast and come join us for life in this quiet corner of the world.
Today I’ll try not to be too antsy about getting into our new house — even though the closing is taking weeks longer than originally projected. That happens, right? I know that in 6 months, these few weeks won’t even matter to me, because we will have settled into family life in a new home. So instead of antsiness, I’m going to just be really, really glad that I get to spend so many days with my dearest family. That I get to hear someone singing or playing in the music room almost all day long — the part I always miss the most about this crazy house!
Today I’ll ask the Lord to help me make these short vapor-like days really count. Because 29 came really fast, and it’ll be gone before I know it, just like all the other years. Because it’s easy to think, “Oh, I’ll do that, or be like that when I’m older,” and guess what? I’m older. Because as fleeting as they are, and as insignificant as they seem, these days have the ability to carry moments that change lives. My life included.
Yeah. Lord, change me.
Love you so so very much.
I had many of those same thoughts as I turned 29 in January. I VIVIDLY remember going to a close friend of the family’s 30th birthday party. I was a young child and she seemed so established and together. Her home was impressive and the way she carried herself, well, I never imagined her losing it with her kids or throwing a measly meal on the table in a state of exhaustion. In my eyes, I have so far to go. I wonder though how I’m viewed by a 10 year old little girl?